23 May 2012


How does one define time? Paul and I don’t like to get super technical, so here is how we break down our time:

1.      Sleepy Time

Paul thinks sleeping is the best part of life, so sleep time is paramount in this house. Naptime is sacred. It even has a song.

“Nap-time, nap-time
Everybody everywhere.
Nap-time, nap-time...”
We tend to make up various lines that sometimes rhyme.

It is never too early or too late for a nap according to Paul. If we wake up at 6:30 and are tired at 8:30 – early nap. If we have been out most of the day and return home at 4:30 – late nap. While napping with a sleep buddy is always preferred, napping solo is acceptable. Napping twice in one day is a great accomplishment.

Then there’s bedtime. Bedtime is so special, there is a dance to indicate it is bedtime. Paul gets a giddy look on his face, smiles, bends his knees, which are shoulder-width apart, bends his arms, hands at face level with the pointer fingers pointed to the sky. Then one hand raises as the opposite hip points outward and the motion begins.

Whether it is naptime or bedtime, I have to remember to turn on the air conditioner and the fan (because the fan has to blow the cold air from the ceiling in the direction of our bed), close the bathroom door (because the air from the air con machine blows at the bathroom door) and close the blinds (because Paul is a vampire who hates light). I kid, but he does like the room as dark as possible. He gets annoyed if light passes through.

2. Together Time

When I wake up in the mornings, I don’t like to start my day right away. I like to take my time, waking up, opening my eyes, getting my body moving again. I like to lie in bed and welcome the sun. I like to roll up next to Paul or, sometimes, roll on top of him so that he can also enjoy the morning and welcome the sun with me.

We also have a fun time we call “touch time.” Touch time started when Paul and I read a book about love languages written by a Christian minister who focuses on marriage and family matters. The book features five ways that people can show love and feel loved and how realizing the characteristics associated with these categories can strengthen relationships.

Paul and I have one of the best relationships I have witnessed so it made sense that our love languages mirror. My top love language is “physical touch,” meaning I show love and feel love through touch – hugs, arm in arm, holding hands or even just linking fingers, etc. My second language is “quality time,” which basically means that I like being around people. We don’t have to do anything crazy – we can just sit and talk over coffee or a meal or just hang out and laugh.

Paul’s top love language is “quality time” and his second is “physical touch.” Perfect – we get each other. With us, if we are in the same room, both on our computers or watching television, we just need our toes to touch and we know it’s all good. When walking, even from point A to point B, we link a finger or wrap an arm around each other and we know we are good. If we do argue, one of us will pull the touch card and go for a hug, an arm wrap or a hand hold to just confirm that everything is O.K.

3. Food Time

If you know anything about me, you know that my entire life revolves around food. I love food. I love to cook food, I love to eat food, I love to think about food. So food time in our house is just as sacred as naptime. When I can, I make breakfast, lunch and dinner.

We have breakfast time, lunch time and dinner time at the table, sitting across from one another. Usually, breakfast is pretty silent; we might chat a bit but there is no distraction. More often than not, we choose to have a bowl of cereal separately – Paul by his computer in his office (usually while I am still enjoying the morning in bed) and then I will have mine at the table once I decide life is worth living.

Lunch time is usually something simple and we do eat at the table and have a chat. Dinner is typically at the table, talking, working and listening to the television. Sometimes we have a friend or a few over and then it gets fun. Michael Buble is heard melting my heart, the table is set, a feast is prepared, drinks are poured and the conversation goes on for hours. So great.

4. TV Time

Paul and I have a few days when we spend our “quality time” on the couch, hanging out with a few of our favorite shows. BBT (a.k.a. The Big Bang Theory) is a must see anytime the show is on the air. HIMYM (How I Met Your Mother) is also a frequent pick. At 7 p.m. weeknights, Paul must watch Alton Brown on the Food Network, and I get to enjoy an episode of FRIENDS at 7:30. Then it’s time for BBT.

I think we watch fewer shows here than we did in the U.S. – mostly because we don’t have a DVR. We have other things to do but we do enjoy a little chill time in TV land – it’s a nice way to relax.

5. Church Time

We have church time once a week, on Sundays of course. Our church has four services beginning at 8:30, 11:30, 2:30 and 5:30. We typically make our service selection Sunday morning; naptime and food time are two contributing factors. In order to make Paul happy, because I tend to make us miss a bus or two, Paul recently ordered me to be ready to leave the house an hour before church begins. This means we typically have 25 minutes between church arrival and service commencement. Meh.

Work Time, Girl Time, Date Day, Coffee Day and Date Night are also time fillers but I feel like I’ve written enough already.

P.S. In the time between writing and publishing this post, I received the following text from my husband who is stuck tonight in Malaysia:

“You can’t see but I’m doing the bedtime dance.” See? I can’t make up this stuff!

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